Service Notes:

Possible interview with a few of the kids about being dad’s someday.

Introduction

Bible addresses the role of father and mother. Find it appropriate that we would on occasion.
Consider how this brief charge shapes Christian parenting in an unchristian world.

Ephesians 6:1–4 (KJV 1900)

1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

2 Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;)

3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.

4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Exhortation based upon a proper understanding of the Gospel

Before any commands to bahave in a certain manner we have had 3 chapters telling us who we have become in Christ
We have seen previously in Ephesians, that Paul has been teaching the church where we sit (in the heavenly places with Jesus Christ, far above all principalities and powers and rulers of wickedness, Eph 1:20-21), and how we walk (not as unwise, but as wise, knowing what the will of the Lord is, Eph 5:17).
“Walking” used in the way Paul uses it (“Walk worthy of the calling with which you were called,” Eph 4:1) is a Hebrew idiom that means, how one conducts one’s life, how one lives, someone’s habitual practice and character; what we do in the course of our days.

Command given to fathers.

Shift from parents in Eph 6:1 “1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.”
Conversation about the role of function of a shepherd. Men let me tell you that you are to shepherd your home.

1 Samuel 3:11–14 (KJV 1900)

11 And the Lord said to Samuel, Behold, I will do a thing in Israel, at which both the ears of every one that heareth it shall tingle.

12 In that day I will perform against Eli all things which I have spoken concerning his house: when I begin, I will also make an end.

13 For I have told him that I will judge his house for ever for the iniquity which he knoweth; because his sons made themselves vile, and he restrained them not.

14 And therefore I have sworn unto the house of Eli, that the iniquity of Eli’s house shall not be purged with sacrifice nor offering for ever.

We know that Eli and his sons were priests. We realize the unique nature of this prophecy.
However, we cannot escape the underlying principle: Eli is being held accountable for failing to “restrain” his sons.

Think of a woman being mugged on the street by a young thug as a policeman looks on. As you approach the officer to ask why he stood there and did nothing, would you be satisfied if he simply shrugged his shoulders, pointed to the young man running from the scene, and said, “You know how they are at that age”? Would that work for you? I doubt it. This would satisfy you no more than if he said, “That fellow did that because he’s a sinner, and I could never change a sinner’s heart.” We don’t ask police officers to change hearts, but to restrain evildoers! And that’s precisely what parents are charged to do.

Fathers are the divinely appointed leaders of the household

There is no more important influence in the life of a child than the influence of the home.

1 Cor 11:3 “3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.”
Ephesians 5:23 “23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.”
1 Thess 2:11-12 “11 As ye know how we exhorted and comforted and charged every one of you, as a father doth his children, 12 That ye would walk worthy of God, who hath called you unto his kingdom and glory.”

Many places in the world the Gospel needs to be proclaimed. In our homes by fathers is certainly one of them.

First, concerning the spiritual state of his family; he ought to be very diligent and cautious, doing his utmost both to increase faith where it is begun, and to begin it where it is not. Therefore, he must diligently and frequently bring before his family the things of God, from His Holy Word, in accordance with what is suitable for each person. And let no man question his authority from the Word of God for such a practice. - John Bunyan

Provoke them not to wrath

Along the way, we exercise care not to “provoke our children” to anger (Colossians 3:21) with undue harshness and condemnation, or with unreasonable expectations that do not fit our children’s capacities, even as we train them toward complete obedience.
Col 3:21 “21 Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.”
we also treat all of our children with fairness, we do not seek to humiliate them, and we do not arbitrarily command them to do something just to show that we have power over them
Parents who are inconsistent with discipline, parents who do not teach their children the Word of God and what is right and wrong, parents who do not teach their children to fear the Lord — all these things are the admonition of the Lord — those parents provoke their children to wrath.

Bring them up

To neglect the instruction of our offspring is worse than brutish. Family religion is necessary for the nation, for the family itself, and for the church of God. . . . Would that parents would awaken to a sense of the importance of this matter. It is a pleasant duty to talk of Jesus to our sons and daughters, and the more so because it has often proved to be an accepted work, for God has saved the children through the parents’ prayers and admonitions. May every house into which this volume shall come honor the Lord and receive his smile. - C. H. Spurgeon:

Multigenerational Family Discipleship

Genesis 1:28 “28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.”

“Adam’s job was to rule and subdue the earth. This seems to mean that his task was to expand the borders of Eden until the whole earth was like Eden, a place where God was present, known, served, worshiped, and uniquely present.”

How can we understand such a mandate apart from a clear call to multigenerational family discipleship?

Seen in the New Testament

Paul acknowledges Timothy’s home discipleship pedigree (2 Tim. 1:4–5; 3:15),
insists that a track record of effective discipleship in the home is an important qualification for ministry in the church (1 Tim. 3:4–5),
and calls fathers specifically to raise their children in the faith (Eph. 6:4; see also Col. 3:20–21).

The clearest link in the New Testament to the family discipleship pattern of the Old Testament is Ephesians 6:1–4:

Ministry to Nurture

Nurture is a word sometimes used positively, sometimes negatively in the New Testament. In this passage it is the positive aspect of the work of the Father.
To nurture, then, is to teach and show our children positively what the Lord requires of them: repentance, faith, and a humble life of obedient service.

Psalm 78:4 “4 We will not hide them from their children, Shewing to the generation to come The praises of the Lord, and his strength, And his wonderful works that he hath done.”

“The character of the Church and of the state depends on the character of the family. If religion dies out in the family, it cannot elsewhere be maintained.” - Charles Hodges (president of Princeton)

What areas of their lives are we cultivating?

The ministry of the Word

It has the positive sense of instruction and training in Paul’s words about the purpose of Scripture in 2 Tim 3:16 “16 All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:”

“Each parent must teach God’s Word to their children out of their own heart, with all diligence. We are not to teach them casually or carelessly or occasionally, but diligently. Our children must recognize that God’s Word is vital in our lives and, therefore, is to be vital in their own.”

Story of my niece hearing about her school teacher made a decision at camp two years earlier he is now living out.

Evangelism

How many days or years has it been since you joined with your child to pray by name for a lost friend?
Which acquaintance of your child could you volunteer to help your child pick up for church this Sunday or Wednesday?
Could your children name an adult friend of yours they know you are seeking to lead to Christ?
When was the last time someone made a profession of faith that a member of your family had a part in reaching?
What step can you take this week to lead members of your family to have hearts for the lost?

Use of time

Eph 5:15-16 “15 See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, 16 Redeeming the time, because the days are evil.”

The use of time is one of the most difficult subjects to broach with Christian men. We’ve

The following three statements could not be more central to parenting.

A person’s concept of reality and truth determines his beliefs!
A person’s beliefs shape his values!
A person’s values drive his actions!”

Because of the decay of American culture, the God-centered worldview children need to construct:

Will be at odds with the views of many of their peers.
May be at odds with the educational system they are part of.
Will certainly be at odds with the entertainment industry that intrudes into their lives.

Parents can be grateful for any assistance the church is giving in teaching a God-centered worldview to their children. But at the same time, parents cannot abdicate to the church the final responsibility for ensuring this is done.Parents need to ask themselves:

To what degree does each of my children see the world and make decisions based on the supremacy of the Lord Jesus Christ?
To what degree does each of my children see the world and make decisions based on his or her desire to see God’s kingdom come on earth?
To what degree does each of my children see the world and make decisions based on a desire to embody God’s name, reflect his character, and obey his word?
To what degree does each of my children see the world and make decisions from the perspective of eternity?

Call to admonish

admonition, has reference rather to words that are spoken.
here are certain admonitions that should be addressed to the child: words of exhortation, words of encouragement, words of reproof,
1 Cor 10:11 “11 Now all these things happened unto them for ensamples: and they are written for our admonition, upon whom the ends of the world are come.”
Paul commands the church’s leaders to “have nothing more to do” with the man “who stirs up division” after “warning him” twice. Titus 3:10 “10 A man that is an heretick after the first and second admonition reject;”

Albert Barnes wrote, “If a man does not teach his children truth, others will teach them error.”

Do you not know that your children have precious and immortal souls within them? They are not all flesh. You who are the parents of their flesh must know that your children have spirits also.

Of the Lord

Eph 6:4 “4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”

This is where Christian parents, engaged in their duty towards their children, are in an entirely different category from all other parents.
It is at this point that the peculiar and specific Christian thinking and teaching enter.
John 17:3 “3 And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.”

To say that Jesus is "Lord" means

Jesus rightful King of the universe
Jesus is ruler over all the world
Jesus is the commander of all the armies of heaven and of all his Christian soldiers on the earth
Jesus is now reigning until he has put all his enemies under his feet,
Jesus is triumphant over sin and death and pain and Satan and hell, and that He will one day establish his kingdom of righteousness and joy on the earth and reign forever and ever to the glory of his Father.
Jesus is in charge of this family.

“So who died and made you in charge?”

When a family is filled with the Spirit, everything is oriented on Christ.

Eph 5:18 “18 And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit;”

After commanding us to be filled with the Spirit in verse 18, almost every verse that follows all the way to 6:9 shows that the Spirit's work is to exalt Christ and orient all of life (especially family life) on him.

The Spirit produces songs to the Lord (Jesus). Eph 5:19 “19 Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord;”
The Spirit produces gratitude to God in the name of the Lord Jesus. Eph 5:20 “20 Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ;”
The Spirit produces submission in reverence for Christ. Eph 5:22 “22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” Eph 5:25 “25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;” Eph 6:1 “1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.”
The Spirit calls fathers bring up their children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Eph 6:4 “4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”

Christian family life is a work of God's Spirit in the lives of those who do everything for Christ's sake.